How was your weekend?
Did you break any laws?
I did.
No, I didn’t dress in black and steel valuable jewels from a museum.
No, I didn’t go to the park and give an envelope full of secrets to a man with a mustache.
I didn’t even accidentally kill anyone.
Instead, I bought a drink.
Let me explain.
The Virus Is Now Illegal
For months, governments all over the world have been wondering which law will finally stop the evil virus.
This law or that law?
This law AND that law?
Last week, the government here in the Czech Republic got really creative.
They decided to ban to-go drinks.
No Mocha Latte Frappuccinos to go.
No banana-blueberry smoothies to go.
And definitely no Flaming Rum Zombies to go.
Normally, I prefer mix and drink my Flaming Zombies myself while seated behind a steering wheel.
So I may never have noticed this new law except that Sunday night a friend and I went to look at the big Christmas tree in the center of town.
And of course, to really appreciate a big Christmas tree on a cold, December night, one must be drinking hot wine.
Fortunately, the hot wine lady was also a criminal, and agreed to sell us our beverage in a banned to-go cup.
A short time later, drinking my illegal hot wine and appreciating my last moments of freedom before the net would be thrown over my eyes or possibly a drone from the sky would simply zap me, I started to think of all the other laws and rules I’ve broken this year.
No speeding…
No tresspassing…
No guests allowed…
And I started to form theories.
Here’s my conclusion:
In a world full of silly laws, the law-breaker is the new hero.
And in the world of confusing grammar rules, schools that waste your time, and methods that are older than the pyramids, the English student who stands tall and shouts “Stop” is also a hero.
Because he/she finally masters English, he becomes a hero to his/her family, kids, colleagues, and self…
In fact, I say, to become fluent in English, you MUST break some rules.
I’ll tell you which ones tomorrow.