CASTLETON, VIRGINIA – “You must stay at home until June 10,” said the governor of Virginia.
“This is going to be bad,” said our president.
“100,000 – 240,000 dead,” said the models who can’t speak or even wear fashionable clothing.
I went online to calculate my chances of survival.
I found an interactive virus map of the world.
Big red dots covered the planet.
I zoomed in.
No red dots over my house.
So far, so good.
I moved the map up, down, left, right. Finally, I found a small red dot in a town twenty minutes down the road. The speed limit on this road is 35-45 miles per hour.
Two sick people. A doctor and his wife.
I looked out my door.
No doctor. No wife. Not even the governor.
So I went for a walk. Across fields. Into the forest. And twenty five minutes later I was sitting on a rock at the top of Castleton Mountain. I could see far, but I could not see the town nor the sick doctor’s house. No red dots, either.
I may be robbed and beaten by squirrels. But I should survive this plague.
And I hope you’re well, too.
If you’re in a tiny apartment with a three-year old and a baby, or a husband who listens to polka all day, or a small dog who likes to bark at the neighbor’s barking dog, or all of the above, well, perhaps some Vitamin V can help.
Here’s what I’m working on…
I’ve got a plan to learn a new language by June 10.
Can I do it?
What are my methods?
Will this require the blood of someone who’s actually good at learning languages?
And how can all this help your English?
Let’s find out…
